Vampires vs. hippies

Girl, you're not because you have a tan (see previous commenter for reasons why this disqualifies you). And you sir, are not, because you are a white man with dreadlocks, which means one thing: hippie! You're a hippie! And even your skinny jeans and your scarf can't change that.

But you guys look mad happy, so, mazel tov! But another thing: obvious happiness is a hipster no-no. (Exceptions to this rule: when watching the television show "Twin Peaks" or finding a Member's Only jacket in a color you don't already own, it is OK to smile and even whistle. But then you have to stop.)

(Via Fashionist)